Steelhead Bum? - Fly Fishing Forum
Pacific Northwest Sea Run Forum No such thing as rainbow trout, only landlocked steelhead

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  #1  
Old 06-02-2004, 03:45 PM
Brian Simonseth's Avatar
Brian Simonseth Brian Simonseth is offline
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Steelhead Bum?

Saw this in the news paper and added somethings

Well, here's one for you Steelhead Bums:

1. Do your waders sometimes not dry out for months?

2. Does your vehicle often smell like something died in it from the mildewy waders?

3. Does your truck/car have a stash of flies under the seat and glove box, embedded in the headliner?

4. Do you always have a rod and a laundry basket containing your waders, boots and other fishing gear, in your rig?

5. Is the floor of your vehicle usually covered with gravel, pop bottles and dirt from when you drove between rivers with your waders on?

6. Do you have more then one piece of carpet on the floor boards?

7. Have you ever called in sick to go Steelhead fishing?

8. Do you base your vacation plans on whether there is a good Steelhead River nearby?

9. Have you ever been late for a social engagement because the river came into shape?

10. Do you avoid making time commitments in the future for fear that the river is going to be good?

11. Do you have a fly-tying table or desk permanently set up at your house, and is it covered with scraps of feathers, fur and pieces of thread?

12. Does your garage look like a used Fly Fishing Shop?

13. Do you fish more than 175 days a year?

14. If you fish less than 75 days a year subtact 5 points!


Scoring: Give yourself 5 points for every yes, 0 for every no.

50-65 points: Yes, you are a Steelhead Bum ó and a miserable excuse for a human being. This should come as no surprise to you, since you have heard this from every responsible person you know for some time now. There's no hope for rehabilitation; there are no 12-step programs for Steelhead Bums. It is the sad truth that your highest aspiration is to be a Steelhead Bum.

30-45 points: There is some small hope for you, but you are probably doomed to follow the dark path you have chosen all the way to the bottom. Your career and relationships probably have already suffered from the neglect necessary to support this lifestyle.

10-25 points: You have Steelhead Bum tendencies. You may dream of one day becoming a Steelhead Bum, but you aren't quite worthless enough to make it over the hump.

5 points or less: Congratulations, you are not a Steelhead Bum. You are probably a respected member of the community. You may enjoy fishing, but your sense of responsibility prevents you from neglecting your obligations. While you take pride in doing the right thing, you know that at the end of life, no one has ever said he or she wished to have worked more and fished less.
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THE NEWER CHIEF of E.P.

Real Steelhead Don't Eat Pellets!!

Last edited by Brian Simonseth; 06-03-2004 at 05:22 PM.
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  #2  
Old 06-02-2004, 03:51 PM
KerryS KerryS is offline
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60 points
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  #3  
Old 06-02-2004, 03:57 PM
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sinktip sinktip is offline
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55 points I could have batted a thousand but:

Rubberized floormats so no need of carpet.

70-75 days a year is all I can manage and still stay both employed and married
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  #4  
Old 06-02-2004, 04:16 PM
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Doublespey Doublespey is offline
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55

Hey, how'd you get in my garage anyway???
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  #5  
Old 06-02-2004, 05:58 PM
Tayside Tayside is offline
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Score 55 dont own a garage and the Navy never alowed sick calls. Perfection is hard to achieve.



Ian
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  #6  
Old 06-02-2004, 07:03 PM
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Big K1 Big K1 is offline
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Only 50.
Now I have something to shoot for.

Kevin
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  #7  
Old 06-02-2004, 07:51 PM
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Greg Pavlov Greg Pavlov is offline
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My favorite steelhead fanatic question: "Do you ride around with your car windows wide open in late fall to get ready for winter fishing ?"
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  #8  
Old 06-02-2004, 08:30 PM
Mean Mr Mustard
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Wow, 2.5 points (since I've been tying only trout flies for the past year, I only took half the allotted points).



mmm

Now if I substituted house for vehicle/truck/car I would gain 20 or so points and be a true Steelhead Bum wannabe.

Last edited by Mean Mr Mustard; 06-02-2004 at 08:34 PM.
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  #9  
Old 06-02-2004, 10:34 PM
roballen2 roballen2 is offline
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1. Do your waders sometimes not dry out for months?
NO Gortex always dries out overnight even in the coldest weather. ( 5pts)

2. Does your vehicle often smell like something died in it from the mildewy waders?
Nope gortex again dries out too fast and never has a chance to mildew ( 5pts)
3. Does your truck/car have a stash of flies under the seat and glove box, embedded in the
headliner?
in the dash, on the floor behind the seat they are everywhere man (5pts)

4. Do you always have a rod and a laundry basket containing your waders, boots and other fishing
gear, in your rig? no
No laundry basket but yes (5pts)

5. Is the floor of your vehicle usually covered with gravel, pop bottles and dirt from when you
drove between rivers with your waders on?

my floor is gravel pop bottles and dirt (5pts)

6. Do you have more then one piece of carpet on the floor boards?
not quite sure what this means? the carpet is soo ripped up that it's in pieces???

7. Have you ever called in sick to go Steelhead fishing?

No dang it somehow i got installed with a good work ethic, however my work is building fishing rods

8. Do you base your vacation plans on whether there is a good Steelhead River nearby?
Is there another reason for a vacation?? (5pts)

9. Have you ever been late for a social engagement because the river came into shape?
yes (5pts)

10. Do you avoid making time commitments in the future for fear that the river is going to be good?
every weekend (5pts)

11. Do you have a fly-tying table or desk permanently set up at your house, and is it covered with scraps of feathers, fur and pieces of thread?

yes (5pts)
12. Does your garage look like a used Fly Fishing Shop?
a very disorganizes fishing sho yes (5pts)

13. Do you fish more than 175 days a year?

unfortunatly no not anymore


50 points
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  #10  
Old 06-02-2004, 11:35 PM
SparseHairHackl SparseHairHackl is offline
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I can only get to 25 or maybe 30 points, but I should get bonus points for how much I complain about how little I fish! If I keep it up, the job and spouse will be gone, and my score will go waaaaay up...

--Bill
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  #11  
Old 06-03-2004, 12:46 AM
Hammer Hammer is offline
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sense of responsibility

THAT is to myself,,after being an employer,or babysitter to all sorts of miserable customer's,employees,etc.-----,well,let's put it THIS way,met a man about a month ago,died last thurs,went down,heart attack,,yes,here today ,gone tomorrow,call me what YOU like,doesn't matter any more;i've transcended human consiousness,,,you only live once,,,smiles are getting harder to comeby these days,if you're not good to yourself nobody else will be,,the guy that kept telling me that while i was deep into the auto repair business7 days a week is long gone also,,,BUM!,,,not to me,just pinching a little of the sweet meat for myself,damn little,,hey,where is Fred Evans,he's getting the good stuff,gotta roll!,bye
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  #12  
Old 06-03-2004, 09:30 AM
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loco_alto loco_alto is offline
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I really liked question #10 for some reason - it struck a chord with me:

10. Do you avoid making time commitments in the future for fear that the river is going to be good?

In a BIG way
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  #13  
Old 06-03-2004, 10:22 AM
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North Island North Island is offline
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Will tie flies for food:hehe:

N I
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  #14  
Old 06-03-2004, 05:23 PM
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Brian Simonseth Brian Simonseth is offline
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Smile

I've added one more (#14) retest yourself.

:hehe:
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Real Steelhead Don't Eat Pellets!!
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  #15  
Old 06-03-2004, 05:36 PM
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sinktip sinktip is offline
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Brian,

Can I wait until Dec. 31st to tally? Now that I have a goal to shoot for I might be able to hit 76.

Either way, I guess I am nothing but a bum
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